Career News 24/7: This is the new, reliable me

Friday, May 27, 2011

This is the new, reliable me

Here are the FeedBlitz email updates for dwyld.kwu.careers@blogger.com

This is the new, reliable me
More Recent Articles
Search Penelope Trunk

This is the new, reliable me

Welcome to the world-famous board meeting for Brazen Careerist.

For those of you who have not been to a board meeting since I had a miscarriage in the board meeting, let me tell you, this one will not be so interesting. At least at a biological level.

What's interesting, maybe, is that there is always tension in the board meeting because who knows what I'll do next?

But I am trying to be on good behavior. I am trying to be a more reliable person. Not so much of a wild card. I just read this study that the five most career-limiting habits of smart people are:

1. Unreliable

2. "It's not my job"

3. Procrastination

4. Resistance to change

5. Negative attitude

I think we each must know what ours is, because I knew right away that mine is unreliability. I have been sort of telling myself that I am so clever, bright, and witty that unreliable doesn't matter. But it does. I feel bad that so many people are reliably there for me and I'm a wild card. So I decide I'm starting to be reliable today. I am going to be dependable and well behaved in the meeting.

I can't sit still. Some people have to rock back and forth or use a squeeze thing. I have to think about something else and write it.

We review how our ideas at Brazen Careerist were too early and now the world is catching up. I think about how I am too far ahead about goats. Goat will be the new beef. Forget cheese. The melting pot of America will be filled with goat meat.

Ed says some very interesting things. I want to tell him, "I am listening! I think you're interesting!" But I know he sees that my notes cannot be anything related to what's going on in the room. Which is true.

I am writing a history of my life. I discover that I can chart the last ten years in interesting ways. For example, a bar chart of how many times I have moved each year shows two times every year for almost each of the last 20 years.

I write a note to myself to thank the Farmer for giving me and the kids a stable home. I love when the kids ask me if we have to move again and I say no.

Then I try writing the big thing that happened every year for the last 20 years. I see a pattern. Things get quiet and then I shake things up. I do startups that go great in LA, then I move to NYC where I have no life. I get a life then I have kids and have a nervous breakdown trying to be a stay-at-home mom. I pull things together in Madison and then I get a startup and a divorce. I get calmness at the farm and now . ..

And now what? I am trying to shake things up again, but I think I waver. I'm not sure how much I want to shake. I know I will end up shaking a lot, though, because I already did something that is definitely a sign of a crazy entrepreneur: I spent camp money for my son on cheese inventory.

Ed says that startups are not small companies, they are experiments. You ask questions and try to find answers and as you know more you pivot more until you are asking and answering such sharp questions that you do begin to have a little company. That is the time when you grow so fast, or sell, and then you're no longer a startup.

So I think I need a new experiment. I get antsy when I am not asking questions. And the only question I'm asking now is, "How is Ryan Healy so good at startup life that he is running my company?" Really, he is such a hard worker and so reliable and smart that all I can think of is that someone better give me a lot of credit for knowing to pluck him out of IBM when he was 23.

Now Ed is talking about chairmanship. He wants someone to be chairman. Right now, Ed is everything: CEO, key investor, Chairman of the Board, career counselor to Penelope. He has a lot going on. But really he just doesn't want to be sued. I think that is what the problem is here. It's unclear, because Ed and Ryan and Erik are talking in some sort of nuanced, corporate speak, and I don't follow. I need things to be more direct.

Sometimes when the board meeting gets to this point, I get very distracted. Last time this happened, I made a chain of 50 paper airplanes. It was actually really lovely. I left it in Erik's conference room. He threw it away.

I don't do that anymore. I'm on good behavior since I'm not the CEO anymore. I think they can just get rid of me if I'm not useful.

Wait. This is a moment when I can be useful. They want me around to get you guys to use Brazen Careerist. But I think, right now, I have readers who are waiting to hear if Cullen and Melissa had sex yet—I'm not sure you care about Network Roulette.

But maybe I don't give you guys enough credit, so here's my pitch. Click here. To Brazen Careerist. And read about the New Lost Generation. And for every click from this page, Ed, Erik and Ryan will put up with one more paper airplane on the string. Also, here's a quote from Melissa, "Wow. There's a new site at Brazen Careerist, and it finally looks like a place people would want to go."