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Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Plan Your Free Online Education at Lifehacker U: Fall Semester 2012

August 29th, 2012Top Story

Plan Your Free Online Education at Lifehacker U: Fall Semester 2012

By Alan Henry

Plan Your Free Online Education at Lifehacker U: Fall Semester 2012 Your education doesn't have to stop once you leave school—freedom from the classroom just means you have more control over what you learn and when you learn it. We've put together a curriculum of some of the best free online classes available on the web this fall for our third term of Lifehacker U, our regularly-updating guide to improving your life with free, online college-level classes. Let's get started.

Orientation: What Is Lifehacker U?

It's back-to-school season, and fall is in the air. Whether you're busy buying new backpacks, books, and laptops, or you're out of school and just want to keep learning, there are an incredible amount of free, university-level courses that become available on the web every school year, and anyone with a little time and a passion for self-growth can audit, read, and "enroll" in these courses for their own personal benefit. Schools like Yale University, MIT, Stanford, the University of California at Berkeley, and many more are all offering free online classes that you can audit and participate in from the comfort of your office chair, couch, or computing chair-of-choice.

If you'll remember from our Summer 2012 semester, some of these classes are available year-round, but many of them are only available during the a specific term or semester, and because we're all about helping you improve your life at Lifehacker, we put together a list of courses available this summer that will inspire you, challenge you, open the door to something new, and give you the tools to improve your life. Grab your pen and paper and make sure your battery is charged—class is in session!


Plan Your Free Online Education at Lifehacker U: Fall Semester 2012

Computer Science and Technology

  • Harvard University - Computer Science 50x - Professor David J. Malan - When budding computer scientists and programmers find themselves at Harvard University, CS50 is the class they wind up in. It's demanding, but completely doable, especially for someone willing to buckle in and put in some effort to learn some broadly applicable programming skills. Whether you want to get a job as a developer and want to get some real skills under your belt, or you need to brush up on your codewriting technique, this open course will do the job. Video lectures and additional content are available at CS50.net and CS50.tv.
  • MIT - 6.00x: Introduction to Computer Science and Programming - Professors John Guttag, Chris Terman, and Eric Grimson - MIT's beginner computer science course will teach you the basics. You'll need to brush off your mathematics skills for this course, since the instructors won't pull punches on the algebra and basic math required to grasp computer science concepts, but aside from that, you can go in bright-eyed and take away applicable skills. Best of all, you can follow along at your own pace.
  • University of California, Berkeley - CS169.1x: Software as a Service - Professors Armando Fox and David Patterson - If webapps are more your fancy and you're interested in building the next big, scalable platform that will draw users to you to make use of your big idea, then this Berkeley course is for you. You'll use Agile techniques to build scalable platforms using Ruby on Rails, from design and development to testing and rollout. You'll learn how cloud applications work, publish your own, and more. You'll need some programming experience for this one though, so make sure you're ready!
  • University of Washington - Information Security and Risk Management in Context - Professor Barbara Endicott-Popovsky - Privacy, security, and confidentiality are more than buzzwords describing "keeping secrets," and in this course you'll learn modern techniques used to secure networks, protect individual privacy, and how businesses and technology professionals alike are addressing modern security issues, even as more businesses get hacked and there's more momentum to put important data—like healthcare records and other sensitive information—on the internet.
  • CSSE490 - Android Development (iTunes U) - David Fisher - while not strictly an online class, the CSSE490 Podcast series will help you learn how to build Android applications from start to finish. Last term we helped you build apps for the iPhone or iPad, and this term, take some time to learn to develop for the other side, with self-paced skill-based lessons that will help you build your first Android app quickly, with supporting documentation on the web.
  • Stanford University - Human-Computer Interaction - Professor Scott Klemmer - Form matters, sometimes as much as function. In this HCI course, you'll learn how to design and build interfaces and systems that people actually want to use - something that a lot of developers often overlook. Building incredible function is important—often paramount—but if your interface is so poor that your tool is unusable and difficult to operate, you've got a dud on your hands. This course will teach you the basics of visual design, help you learn to poll individuals for design ideas, build paper prototypes, do field work, and test your designs with others. The end goal is for you to learn what it takes to incorporate intelligent design into any technology.
  • MIT - Culture of Computing - Professor Stefan Helmreich - Computer science may be at the cutting edge of technology today, but as a discipline it has a long and storied history that's well worth learning. This course will look back at the history of computing in our society, including the manufacturing of automata, early computers during the second World War, the development and growth of the Internet, the rise of hackers and the subcultures that have risen thanks to technology, as well as social issues like gender and hacker culture and how they play into modern perceptions of technology.

Plan Your Free Online Education at Lifehacker U: Fall Semester 2012

Finance and Economics

  • Investopedia - Budgeting Basics - Amy Fontinelle - Budgeting sounds easy, and it's something everyone should do, but if you're having a hard time making your budget work, or having a hard time sticking to your budget, it might be time to look at how you did it or start from scratch. This course from Investopedia may not be professor-driven, but it's a great set of instructions that you can follow along with in your spare time to help you get your expenditures under control and start saving money.
  • Yale University - ECON 252: Financial Markets - Professor Robert J. Shiller - If the way the stock market, commodities markets, and bonds both puzzle and interest you, this course will help demystify how global financial markets work, and give you some insight into what you can expect when economists on the news say things like "erratic" and "psychology driven." The course explains what risk is in a financial setting, how financial institutions manage risk, regulate themselves (or require outside regulation), how monetary policy set by agencies and governments affect the market, and more. The course is available via YouTube or iTunes U at the link above.
  • SmallBizU/Kutztown University of Pennsylvania - Finding Money to Start a Business - If you have an idea that you want to get off the ground, but finding the cash to do so is the problem, this 3-hour course will help you figure out where you can raise money, how to go about doing it, and some other important things an entrepeneur should consider when looking for the cash to make his or her idea reality.
  • Investopedia - The Complete Guide to Retirement Planning for 20-Somethings | 30-Somethings | 40-Somethings | 50-Somethings - Denise Appleby - Wherever you are in life, it's not too late to start saving for retirement. The tactics, however, to best maximize your returns and live comfortably, vary depending on your age, so this series of courses is broken down into age groups with advice best suited to each. Choose your adventure, and get started planning for your future—whether it's with funds, stocks, bonds, or good old fashioned interest-bearing CDs and IRAs.
  • University of California, Irvine - Fundamentals of Personal Financial Planning - You have your budget, but it's tenuous. You're not sure whether or not you should be paying down your debt or saving for the future or both or what. If you feel a little overwhelmed by your personal finance needs, this course will help you master not just the basics of financial planning, but cut through the fog of confusion and options to help you decide which approach is best for you and your life situation.
  • Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health - Principles of Obesity Economics - Professor Kevin Frick - Obesity, whether it's an individual issue or a public health problem, is more complicated than "putting the fork down" or "not eating so much." There are a lot of factors in play, only a few of which are limited to the consumer. This course addresses the issue of consumer sovereignty—or the concept that we alone are responsible for our consumption decisions, alongside topics of consumer pressure to make decisions based on factors like time constraints, budgets, value, and more. The course also addresses governmental intervention into the issue as a public policy concern, and how that plays into and against business interests and the issue of consumer choice.

Plan Your Free Online Education at Lifehacker U: Fall Semester 2012

Science and Medicine

  • Carnegie Mellon University - Anatomy & Physiology - Our bodies are probably some of the most glorious and complex tools we'll ever have the privilege of using, so why not take some time to learn how it works? This introductory course from CMU's Open Learning Initiative gives you the opportunity to learn how your body works, some of the complex systems at play and busily working even as you sit and read this, and concepts like homeostasis, the levels of organization from the cellular to the macro—including the way organs are built and interact, and more.
  • MIT - Physics and the Chemistry of the Terrestrial Planets - Professors Benjamin Weiss and Leigh Royden - Although a touch dated, this course will walk you through the basics of the composition of the planets in our solar system, including rocky bodies like Earth and Mars all the way out to the massive gas giants like Jupiter and Neptune. The course pays attention to how each planet formed and got its chemical composition, and what probes headed for those planets can expect to find there.
  • Yale University - GG 140: The Atmosphere, the Ocean, and Environmental Change - Professor Ronald B. Smith - Climate change, El Nino, the ozone layer—all of these topics are fair game in this introductory course about the Earth's climate, its history, its changes over the millennia, and how it's changing today. You'll learn the importance of separating weather from climate in the course while still understanding how weather can be a symptom of climate events, you'll learn whether those cyclical climate changes you've heard about are really true, and you'll have the opportunity to challenge your own beliefs on environmental science and climate change with facts and data to back them up in an environment led by a geophysicist.
  • Caltech - Drugs and the Brain - Professor Henry A. Lester - Bring your neuroscience pants to this class: Lester covers the issue of drug use for therapy, prevention, treatment, and recreation, all in one packed class full of information that won't require that you have a specific background, but a mind familiar to science and scientific thinking will do well here. By the end of the course, you'll have a new appreciation for the complexities of the brain and how chemical interactions can change everything about our body chemistry.
  • Duke University - Introduction to Astronomy - Professor Ronen Plesser - This course doesn't start for a while, but it's one of the best introductions to the machinations of the universe around us that you'll see. You'll definitely need to flex your mathematics muscles here - this is no all-observation course. You'll learn not just how celestial bodies move and operate, but also the equations and mathematics that explain how it all works.
  • Yale University - EEB 122: Principles of Evolution, Ecology and Behavior - Professor Stephen C. Stearns - If topics like evolutionary biology confuse you, or if you're looking for a way to challenge your own confirmation bias by learning more about biology and natural selection, this course is a great way to start. You'll walk through topics of transmission genetics, natural selection, adaptive behavior, sex (the evolution of and sexual selection), the importance of biodiversity, and even the evolutionary rationale between selfishness and altruism in a social context.
  • MIT - Science Communication: A Practical Guide - Professors John Durant and Dr. Bina Venkataraman - If you're scientifically inclined (like myself) you also understand how difficult it can be to communicate the complex concepts addressed in scientific research to people who know little about the topic. This course offers tools that can help you discuss topics like climate change, astronomy, genetics, and more with people for whom the topics seem advanced, or whose education on the matters consists largely of heresy and Facebook posts. By the end of this class, you'll be ready to be an expert witness or give a live interview.

Plan Your Free Online Education at Lifehacker U: Fall Semester 2012

Mathematics

  • Stanford University - Introduction to Mathematical Thinking - Professor Keith Devlin - Mathematicians have a certain "way" about them, and this class you'll learn to approach problems with the same mindset. Break down the problems you're confronted with into manageable components, see how they interrelate, and approach them individually. This isn't about how you deal with math problems in school: the skills you'll learn in this six week course will be applicable far more broadly to problems you may never have encountered before.
  • La Trobe University - The Algebra of Everything (iTunes U) - Professor Marcel Jackson - If you've promptly forgotten all of the algebra you may have learned in school because it just "wasn't applicable," think twice. This course will brush off those skills and show you how there's algebra—and mathematics—everywhere around us, and show you how you can put those algebraic skills to good use.
  • Udacity - Intro to Statistics (ST101) - Professor Sebastian Thrun - We're assaulted with statistics on a daily basis, usually used to support or refute points of view or opinions—so much so that many people just ignore statistics entirely, but that's the last thing you should do. This course helps you learn to use statistics for decision-making, whether it's a matter of probability or whether it's looking at the flip side of a societal debate and using the statistics of the matter to see through to the truth. You don't need a math background for this course, but by the end of it you'll be familiar with terms like regression, correlation (and the correlation vs. causation question), standard deviation, and more.

Plan Your Free Online Education at Lifehacker U: Fall Semester 2012

Social Sciences, Classics, and Humanities

  • Carnegie Mellon University - American English Speech - The goal here isn't to learn english, and you won't boost your vocabulary, but you will learn to enunciate, you'll learn the impact of the words you choose and the way you say them, and you'll learn the nuances of American English speech. You'll become familiar with the symbols that represent the sounds we make, and overall improve your own speech—assuming you speak American English. If you don't, by the end of the course, you'll have a new appreciation for the complexities of the language and its dialects.
  • Princeton University - History of the World Since 1300 - Jeremy Adelman - It's a lot of ground to cover, but the world has changed an incredible amount since 1300 AD, and this whirlwind course will take you through it, without just focusing on one continent and one people's history. You'll start with Chinggis Khan and the Mongol invasions, and then traverse the globe to Europe, Africa, the Indian subcontinent, and the Americas to see how major culture, political, and societal shifts took place, many at the same time.
  • MIT -Music and Technology: Live Electronics Performance Practices - Professor Christopher Ariza - Fans of electronic music, unite! This course will walk you through the beginnings of electronic music and musical instruments, from early analog devices to more modern synthesizers, including how musicians choose to include technology in their live performances.
  • University of Pennsylvania - Modern and Contemporary American Poetry - Professor Al Filreis - Aside from being a manner of expression, poetry can tell us a lot about a time and its way of life, even moreso than history books in some cases. This course takes a tour from Dickinson and Whitman and walks us through American poetry all the way to 21st century experimental poets looking to make a name for themselves today and the messages they want to send. If the last poetry you read was in an English class (or even if not!), spend some time with this course and get up to speed with the work modern poets are doing.
  • Yale University - Roman Architecture - Professor Diana E. E. Kleiner - The Roman Empire was responsible for some of the world's greatest marvels of architecture and building design, and many of those examples still stand today across a wide swath of what was once one of the largest empires on Earth. Even today's architects struggle to match the complexity and precision of those old buildings, and in this course you'll learn what made Roman architecture so special, so inspirational to modern designers, and see beautiful examples of how good design and building can last the ages, from places where Rome reigned and far beyond.
  • MIT - Foundations of World Culture I: World Civilizations and Texts - Dr. Ghenwa Hayek - This course will introduce you to some of the most brilliant text, literature, history, and old stories to ever exist, starting in ancient antiquity and bringing you up to the 17th century. Ancient civilizations you may never have heard of will come to light and you'll read some of their world-view defining literature, and other cultures you may have thought you were familiar with will surprise you. The course is complex, but if you take the time to go through it, it'll open your eyes to a world bigger than what's outside your front door.

Plan Your Free Online Education at Lifehacker U: Fall Semester 2012

Law

  • The Open University - Laying Down the Law (iTunes U) - Does prison actually work to reform criminals? Do individuals have the right to choose when and under what circumstances they die? This course tackles all of these topics and more, with guest lecturers sitting in for every session discussing a new topic, all centered on the core question: does the traditional rule of law as we understand it work to preserve the stability of society, or does it need to change?
  • Liberty University - Introduction to Forensics (iTunes U) - If you've ever wondered how investigators find DNA at crime scenes, test for and record fingerprints, or in general investigate a crime scene with the intent of finding whatever microscopic evidence a criminal may have left behind, this course offers real-world insight from experts. Trust us, it's better than watching CSI.
  • University of Michigan - Securing Digital Democracy - Professor J. Alex Halderman - Electronic voting has been a hot topic for years now, and every election cycle the issue of security and ties between electronic voting machines and the companies that develop them and political campaigns crops up. In this course, you'll learn what the real risks are, what the benefits to electronic voting are, whether Internet voting technologies could ever work or be used on a large scale, and the implications for the law and the political system—all from a perspective of computer science, not politics.

Plan Your Free Online Education at Lifehacker U: Fall Semester 2012

Cross-Disciplinary Courses and Seminars

  • Duke University - Think Again: How to Reason and Argue - Professors Walter Sinnott-Armstrong, Ram Neta - If your current understanding of arguing and discussion stem from commenting on the internet, you need this course. Sinnott-Armstrong and Neta will show you how to use critical thinking skills to form rational, reasoned arguments to support or refute positions based on information and data, not confirmation bias and "my team is better than your team" thinking. You'll learn how to spot an argument, how to analyze it, the criteria for a good argument versus a bad one, and perhaps just as importantly—how to mess up an argument and the criteria for a flawed argument. By the end of the course, you'll be able to speak about and discuss issues that are important to you in a rational and intelligent way, or so we hope.
  • Udacity - How to Build a Startup (EP245) - Steve Blank Building a startup requires more than just a few million dollars from an angel investor and a semi-brilliant idea, and Steve Blank, a seasoned Silicon Valley entrepenur who's seen both sides of the coin, can help you build a plan to get your idea off the ground. Blank walks through the process of building your idea, getting people engaged and involved with your ideas, turning those people into customers, and then using their feedback to both improve your product and market it to make your business stronger.
  • MIT - Technology in Transportation - Prof. Sanjay Sarma - From the steam engine to the combustion engine to the rocket, this course will show you how technology has shaped the way we move from place to place, and in turn, how the transportation industry has shaped technology and advancement. Topics including radar, GPS, GIS, aerodynamics, vehicle engineering, and more will be covered, and the materials are all available online.
  • University of California, Irvine - Introduction to Project Management - This course won't help you become a PMP, but it will show you how to handle projects and massive initiatives from a high level, balancing competing priorities and needs, working with schedules, adjusting deadlines, and more. You'll learn the "triple constraint" or scope, time, and budget, and how to balance them, and come away with the class with not just an appreciation for the profession, but the tools to coordinate your own personal projects.
  • MIT - Special Subject: The Rise of Film Noir - Dr. Martin Marks If you're a film buff and enjoy the Noir genre, you'll want to take this course. If you've been wondering why every film lately needs to be "dark," "gritty," and "edgy" to make an impact at the box office, this course is for you too. The class examines what exactly the Film Noir genre really is, how it got started as we know it, and examples of so-called Neo-Noir appearing in today's cinema.

Extra Credit: How To Find Your Own Online Classes

The cirriculum at Lifehacker U is rich and deep, but it may not reflect all of your areas of interests or expertise. If you're looking for more or more varied course material, here are some resources to help you find great, university-level online classes that you can take from the comfort of your desk, at any time of day.

  • Academic Earth curates an amazing list of video seminars and classes from some of the world's smartest minds, innovators, and leaders on a variety of topics including science, mathematics, politics, public policy, art, history, and more.
  • TED talks are well known for being thought provoking, interesting, intelligent, and in many cases, inspiring and informative. We've featured TED talks at Lifehacker before, and if you're looking for seminars on the web worth watching, TED is worth perusing.
  • edX is a collection of free courses from leading Universities like the University of California, Berkeley, MIT, and Harvard. There aren't many, but the ones offered are free, open to the public, and they rotate often.
  • Coursera has a broad selection of courses in-session or beginning shortly that you can take for academic credit (if you're enrolled) or just a certificate of completion that shows you've learned a new skill. Topics range from science and technology to social science and humanities, and they're all free.
  • Udacity offers a slimmer selection of courses, but the ones offered are not only often for-credit, but they're instructor led and geared towards specific goals, with skilled and talented instructors walking you through everything from building a startup to programming a robotic car.
  • Education-Portal.com has a list of universities offering free and for-credit online classes to students and the public at large.
  • Open Culture's list of free online courses is broken down by subject matter and includes classes available on YouTube, iTunes U, and direct from the University or School's website.
  • The Open Courseware Consortium is a collection of colleges and universities that have all agreed to use a similar platform to offer seminars and full classes—complete with notes, memos, examinations, and other documentation free on the web. They also maintain a great list of member schools around the world, so you can visit universities anywhere in the world and take the online classes they make available.
  • The Khan Academy offers free YouTube-based video classes in math, science, technology, the humanities, and test preparation and study skills. If you're looking to augment your education or just take a couple video classes in your spare time, it's a great place to start and has a lot of interesting topics to offer.
  • The University of Reddit is a crowd-built set of classes and seminars by Reddit users who have expertise to share. Topics range from computer science and programming to paleontology, narrative poetry, and Latin. Individuals interested in teaching classes regularly post to the University of Reddit subthread to gauge interest in future couses and announce when new modules are available.
  • The Lifehacker Night School is our own set of tutorials and classes that help you out with deep and intricate subjects like becoming a better photographer, building your own computer, or getting to know your network, among others.

The beautiful thing about taking classes online is that you can pick and choose the classes you want to attend, skip lectures and come back to them later(in some cases - some classes require your regular attendance and participation!), and do examinations and quizzes on your own time. You can load up with as many classes as you choose, or take a light course load and come back to some of the classes you meant to take at another time that's more convenient for you.

With Lifehacker U, you're free to take as many or as few of these classes as you like, and we'll update this course guide every term with a fresh list of courses on new and interesting topics, some of which are only available during that academic term.

If you have online course resources or your university offers classes that are available for free online that you know would be a great fit for Lifehacker U, don't keep them to yourself! Send them in to us at tips+lifehackeru@lifehacker.com so we can include them in the next semester!

Title photo remixed from an original by Joe Mercier (Shutterstock).

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Where the World's Most Horrible Crap Comes From

August 29th, 2012Top Story

Where the World's Most Horrible Crap Comes From

By Cord Jefferson

Where the World's Most Horrible Crap Comes FromI am a man well versed in tacky shit; I spent the lion's share of my formative years in Tucson, Arizona. If you haven't been there, Tucson—like most mid-sized touristy cities with a lot of retirees—is filled to the top of its cacti with the kind of poorly made trinkets old people love to vomit all over their houses and vacationers love to pick up on the cheap to take back home as gifts.

In nearly every corner store in Tucson, the thrifty shopper can find posters that read, "Arizona: It's a dry heat!" above a drawing of two skeletons roasting in a desert; keychains in the shape of saguaros; roadrunner magnets; and, for the true desert memorabilia connoisseur, a dreamcatcher adorned with a kokopelli, an American Indian fertility god that's about as prevalent in certain parts of the Southwest as meth.

For years and years in Tucson—and then after, in places like Key West, Honolulu, New York City, even Sarajevo—I have drowned in the mediocrity of so many tchotchkes, and wondered where they were born. From what warehouse in what ring of hell do ceramic dogs holding signs that say, "Wipe Yer Paws," originate? Or is it opposite: Does God make "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy" t-shirts? I finally found out where the world gets all the garbage with which she fills her card shops and gift stores and gas-station toy racks. This stuff doesn't come from hell. It comes from somewhere innumerably worse: Vegas.

When asked if I'd be game to attend something called the "China Brand Show," I agreed to the plan without hesitation, despite having no idea what to expect. China is in the news so much these days that, for fear of missing something great or insidious, it seemed important for me to not turn down even a remote opportunity to bask in its glowing red aura. China Toothbrush Show? I'll go to that. China Garfield Sticker Convention? Sign me up. China Panda Wrestling Seminar? Definitely. Within five days of first hearing the vague assortment of words that is "China Brand Show," I'm on a 6 a.m. flight to Las Vegas to ascertain all there is to know about China and its brands.

After dropping my luggage off at my hotel, Treasure Island, a pirate-themed resort casino that's ugly and loud in the way all resort casinos are, I step into the Vegas heat—109 degrees that day—to wait for my shuttle to the convention center. On a hard wooden bench, I eavesdrop on a group of five people waiting for a bus to take them to the airport.

Where the World's Most Horrible Crap Comes From

"I was wasted last night," says one woman.

"I know," responds another. "Do you remember kissing that guy?"

"Yes," says the first woman. The word "yes" here sounds the way a child says it when you ask them if they're the one who broke the vase in the living room.

When my shuttle finally arrives, we're forced to wait for a couple minutes after the cab driver we're behind unloads a woman's suitcases for her, gets back into his taxi, and then accidentally runs over the suitcases he just unloaded, dragging a duffel bag for several feet and exploding pastel clothing everywhere. "What a fucking idiot guy," says the shuttle driver. "Totally," I say. We bond over the stupid cabbie for the entire 10-minute drive to the Las Vegas Convention Center, during which we pass a fake New York, a fake Paris, a woman with fake breasts plastered on the side of a truck that drives around town advertising prostitutes. Americans like to mock Los Angeles, my town, as being fake. But if there is a truly inauthentic city in the United States, it is with utter certainty Las Vegas.

Where the World's Most Horrible Crap Comes FromWhen we get to the convention center, it is thronged. It turns out the China Brand Show is merely one wing of the massive ASD Las Vegas trade show, one of the largest consumer merchandise shows in the world. Its tagline: "Find everything, buy anything—here."

If you've never been to a trade show, know that it looks exactly like you imagine: men in khakis and women in khaki skirts mill around wheeling roller luggage filled with brochures and catalogues. Most people wear ASDLV-issued lanyards, neon sheets of paper that give your name, your company's name, and your hometown. Glancing down at someone's lanyard to decide whether they're worth talking to is, I assume, the middle-management human's versions of the way dogs smell each other's genitals. As I walk past a pack of sharply dressed ladies in short skirts, one in leopard-print heels says, "Fuck that fucking bitch."

After a comically long interaction with an elderly woman who can't find my name in the computer, I get my own lanyard and set off to the China Brand Show, bypassing the other arms of ASDLV, which include everything from tools to makeup to fashion accessories. I finally find the China Brand Show tucked far away in a small section of the North Hall, stuck between "jewelry" and "imprinted sportswear."

"This is it?" I say to nobody in particular.

Where the World's Most Horrible Crap Comes From

I wish I could tell you that the China Brand Show blew my mind with technological wonder, causing me to fear the burgeoning country's vision, inventiveness, and impending power. I wanted to see new gadgets that would make the Giz editors' eyes twinkle. I wanted them to scream with glee at my findings and accept me—a comparative luddite—into their club. Sadly, what I saw instead was a lot of the same crap Americans have always loved, just made a little cheaper.

What nobody told me before heading into ASDLV was that, though it is a consumer good show, it would be foolish to go in expecting to see many goods the average Gizmodo reader would want to consume. Some of the big-name buyers ASDLV likes to flaunt are 7-Eleven, 99-Cents Only Stores, Hy-Vee, and Family Dollar. All successful and notable companies in their own rights, but not necessarily know for their high-end, innovative technological wares.

One booth, manned by a Chinese man and a white American, was selling lighters decorated with naked women, dragons, guns, and Confederate flags—the stuff you might be into if you're also interested into having an elaborate implement of fire on your person. If you bought in bulk, you could get some of the plainer styles for $14 a dozen. But if you wanted the ones made heavy with a screaming, fanged skull in relief, you'd be looking at $24 a dozen. "Everything in our catalogue is here in the States," the American says to me as I walk by. "We can have them to you just a few days from now."

Another booth is selling decorative toilet seats. There's one hawking cheap cookware and steak knives. When I see a clock merchant advertising a clock with the Walt Disney logo on it, I ask him if knows about the legality of using that trademark. He waves me away, saying he doesn't understand the question. My favorite booth had nothing in it except for two rows of 12 shoes. Not 12 pairs, mind you, but 12 single shoes. Most of them are rendered with a patchwork of colored pleather—eggplant, brown, yellow—but the boots sport crosses on the ankles, accented with copper-colored studs arranged to make the design of another, smaller cross inside the pleather cross. Gotta get me some of those. Nobody was manning the booth, leading me to believe that whoever made the shoes was either embarrassed of them or well aware that they are not in danger of being stolen.

After about a half hour of walking around the China Brand Show, I see only one deal being made: An American man is looking over papers to buy a bundle of baseball caps. I hover over the transaction and watch the Chinese woman selling the caps calculate how much each hat is going to cost. She comes up with 98 cents. The China Brand Show is cheap.

Where the World's Most Horrible Crap Comes From

Walking dejectedly away from the Chinese goods, I've got an hour to kill until the last shuttle back to the hotel arrives. I decide to make my way to some of the ASDLV's other areas. In the jewelry section, I'm fascinated by the casualness with which a salesman and a Persian man haggle over an extravagantly priced diamond and emerald bracelet. "I'll give you thirteen thousand," says the shopper. "I respect your offer," says the salesman, "but I'd be losing a lot of money if I took it." "Think about it," the shopper responds. "I'll be back tomorrow." With that, he turns away, both his hands overloaded with shopping bags.

After slowly ambling from room to room, I find that most of the show is at least more interesting than the China Brands section. But I'm most intrigued by the "value and variety" area.

Value and variety, to my excitement, is a football-field-sized room of bullshit designed to entice and delight children of every age. Want a rubber ring that looks like an eyeball and flashes a red light at a seizure-inducing pace when you press down on the pupil? They have that. Want a toy cat that spins its tail really fast, forcing it roll over and over around a room? They have that, too. Want a wind chime topped by a giant blue fairy who is hugging a dolphin, a jewelry box emblazoned with a flaming skeleton riding a motorcycle, or a metal sign that says "Man Cave" on it? Got it, got it, and got it. This is where good taste goes to die. This is what impulse buy dreams are made of, and a communist's worst nightmare: A giant room in the middle of Las Vegas in which people buy and sell cheap, poorly made garbage that literally nobody actually needs. And where is most of this stuff made? China.

In retrospect, probably the most eye-opening thing about ASDLV was that, though the China Brand Show was underwhelming—and, from the looks of things, underattended—China was well represented elsewhere at the conference, especially in Value and Variety. From the gloves with the glowing finger tips—"Very popular at Burning Man"—to the plastic bird, wings extended, that could balance on its beak on your fingertip, the majority of what I saw at ASDLV was made in China. Speaking to a woman from CoolGlow, a Texas-based company that specializes in light-up party supplies, I ask if most of their merchandise is made in Texas. "No," she says. "It's made in China." Before I left her booth, she gave me a glowing foam stick with the CoolGlow logo taped to the side. Pressing a button on one end of the stick changed the color it glowed. On the other end, a white plastic cap read, "Made in China."

It's worth noting that, despite what fearmongering stories about China's ascent may have you believing, the majority of the stuff Americans buy is made in the United States. Conversely, goods labeled "Made in China" account for less than 3 percent of U.S. consumer spending. Yes, the Chinese may be slowly developing a monopoly on the manufacture of crass gag keychains, but keychains that say "Queen Bitch" in sparkly letters do not empires make. The numbers reflect that truth: "Note that China is not only poorer than the USA, it's poorer than Ecuador," wrote Matt Yglesias in 2010. "It's about half as rich as Uruguay or Belarus. Trinidad has about triple the per capita GDP of China." China is also seeing a significant slowdown in its manufacturing boom, due in part to the fact that Americans have less money to spend on all this stuff.

On the shuttle away from the ASDLV, I think about how fitting it is for a trade show dealing mostly in tacky shit to take place in Las Vegas. Cornball magicians and past-their-prime comedians stare at our bus from billboards high in the desert sky as we drag slowly through rush-hour traffic. I am tired. Back at my hotel, weaving through the casino floor on the way to my room, I note the dozens of people staring blankly and silently while they diligently pull the handles on whirring and dinging slot machines. Some pull drags off of Marlboro Lights, others sip fruity drinks from neon-orange yard glasses. I marvel at how much money they're throwing away into the machines, over and over and over again. At least they're spending in America, I suppose.

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Isaac just won't take a hint; Obama's (real) Reddit AMA; Yahoo editor loses job over "black people" joke; and more.

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Wednesday, August 29, 2012

What you missed from the Slatest (@slatest), your trusty news companion.

By Josh Voorhees (@JoshVoorhees)

HURRICANE NO MORE: Isaac has been downgraded back to a tropical storm, with max sustained winds right around 70 mph. According to the last update we've seen from the National Weather Service, the storm is 60 miles west of New Orleans, and steadily crawling northwest at a frustratingly slow 6-mph pace.

SO IT'S OVER? In a word: No. In a few more (from the NWS): "Even though Isaac is no longer a hurricane, life-threatening hazards from storm surge and inland flooding are still occurring."

THE GOOD NEWS: At least from what we can tell right now, New Orleans' levees and flood-protection service appears to have largely held strong. "The system is performing as intended, as we expected," an Army Corps spokeswoman said earlier today. "We don't see any issues with the hurricane system at this point."

THE BAD: Isaac may not have lived up to its Katrina-like billing, but it nonetheless is dumping its fair share of water on the Gulf Coast, leaving hundreds of thousands of people without power in the process. The area that has so far fared the worst is Plaquemines Parish (90-odd miles outside of New Orleans), where a local levee has been unable to keep the surge at bay. 

AP: "Louisiana Gov. Bobby Jindal said officials may cut a hole in a levee on the east bank of Plaquemines Parish to relieve pressure on the structure. At a news conference in Baton Rouge, Jindal said there was no estimate on when that might occur. He said as many as 40 people are reportedly in need of rescue in the area."

STORM STIMULUS: "Natural disasters lead to a surge of activity, not permanent depressions—we need to apply those lessons to recovering from the financial crisis." Matthew Yglesias explains.

It's Wednesday. Welcome to the Slatest PM, where now that we have the weather report out of the way we'll do our best to make sense of the wide-ranging aftermath of last night's RNC festivities.

BUT FIRST: President Obama took to Reddit today for an AMA (Ask Me Anything). Seriously.

GRAMMAR POLICE: Obama writes [emphasis added]: "And although their will be occasional disagreements on the details of various legislative proposals, I won't stray from that principle - and it will be reflected in the platform." He must be so embarrassed.

HOT MIC: "They are happy to have a party with black people drowning." Those were the words that cost Yahoo! News Washington bureau chief his job today, after his comments were recorded during last night's online broadcast by a live microphone.

Yahoo!: "David Chalian's statement was inappropriate and does not represent the views of Yahoo!. He has been terminated effective immediately. We have already reached out to the Romney campaign, and we apologize to Mitt Romney, his staff, their supporters and anyone who was offended."

"THIS IS HOW WE FEED THE ANIMALS": Those were the words that a pair of RNC attendees reportedly shouted at a black CNN camerawoman last night, prompting convention organizers to give them the boot.

RNC: "Two attendees tonight exhibited deplorable behavior. Their conduct was inexcusable and unacceptable. This kind of behavior will not be tolerated."

NOT SO FAST ON THIS ONE: Delegates didn't shower boos on a Puerto Rican party functionary yesterday, as some have reported. The boos instead were an unrelated display of emotion from Ron Paul fans. 

BUT WHAT ABOUT THE SPEECHES? Slate's RNC Breakfast Club has you covered:

John Dickerson: "Ann Romney gave a wonderful speech. ... But was it a great political speech? I'm not so sure. It depends on what your previous feelings were about Mitt Romney and if you watched it on television or are going to hear about it later."

Sasha Issenberg: "Ann's [speech] seemed to miss the mark not only because, as John neatly outlined, it was entirely free of revealing anecdote. I felt as though it confused hardship with the humdrum in a way that seemed even more detached from the way most Americans live than any car elevator or Swiss bank account"

Kerry Howley: "I feel especially dubious about journalistic speculation—my own included—on the emotional power of this speech. It was a speech written for the base; no one else cares about conventions."

WORD CLOUD: Last night's GOP speakers loved "Mitt" but not as much as they loved "America."

TV WARS: Politico: "Fox News outperformed the competition on night one of the GOP convention, drawing more viewers than NBC, ABC, and CBS in the 10 p.m. hour and at least four-times as many viewers as its cable competitors MSNBC and CNN, according to preliminary Nielsen ratings. NBC News won the most viewers in the coveted 25-54-year-old demographic."

TONIGHT'S MARQUEE: John McCain, Mike Huckabee, Condi Rice and Paul Ryan.

WHAT TO EXPECT: WSJ: "Vice-presidential candidate Paul Ryan will take the stage on Wednesday evening at the Republican National Convention, bringing his message about the need to drastically shrink the size of the federal government and overhaul the social safety net to a prime-time audience." 

JUST SOME POLITICIAN THAT HE USED TO KNOW: Slate's Will Saletan has fallen out of love with the VP nominee who set his heart aflutter only weeks ago. Read his break-up letter here

RUNNING THE TRAPS—

NYT: "President Bashar al-Assad of Syria said in an excerpt from a television interview broadcast Wednesday that his government’s battle against opposition forces would need 'time' and had not yet been resolved, in what appeared to be a sober assessment of the resilience of the armed insurgency and the limits of a military hobbled by a steady stream of defections."

WSJ: "The Obama campaign crowds appear to be getting bigger. For months, he’s been addressing crowds of two or three thousand people, sometimes less—respectable, and bigger than what rival Mitt Romney was used to, at least before Rep. Paul Ryan joined the GOP ticket. But the Obama rallies were nowhere near what he saw in 2008."

AP: "A firsthand account of the Navy SEAL raid that killed Osama bin Laden contradicts previous accounts by administration officials, raising questions as to whether the terror mastermind presented a clear threat when SEALs first fired upon him." 

We'll see you back here tomorrow. In the meantime, tell your friends to subscribe here. You can also follow the whole team at @slatest and your host at @JoshVoorhees. Or fill his inbox with links, mini-explainer requests and anything else that's on your mind at josh.voorhees@slate.com.

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