| Universal Travel Rules Revised Posted: 21 Feb 2013 03:45 AM PST  Back in 2009, I wrote the Punk Rock HR Guide to Universal Travel Rules. Then I wrote a few more. I will quickly summarize them.
- Two carry-ons means TWO carry-ons.
- If it takes you more than 45 seconds to stow your luggage in the overhead bin you should have checked it.
- Unless you're curing cancer, turn off your blackberry and don't make the flight attendant ask twice.
- No cell phone usage in any kind of line: bathroom, Starbucks, Hudson News, line for the gate agent, etc.
- When in doubt, pee before the flight. Can't hurt. Only helps.
- Take that damn bluetooth thing out of your ear on the plane.
- No one wants to see you make out with your significant other on a plane. We're headed to Raleigh, not Maui.
- On escalators and moving walkways, please stand on the right and walk on the left, for f@#$'s sake.
- Please don't try to bring everything you own onto the plane in a single, carry on bag.
- Wear the most comfortable clothing you own on the flight.
- Use your inside voice in the airport and on planes.
- Don't even think about hassling TSA.
I have a few more in 2013. - Sign up for the U.S. Customs and Border Protection (CBP) Trusted Traveler Program, which qualifies you for TSA PreCheck.
- No wet or smelly food on the plane. This includes pizza, hot wings, eggs, juicy ham sandwiches with mayo or hamburgers with extra onion.
- Exit the plane according to rows. If your luggage is in the back, wait your turn and move up row-by-row. Get out of the aisle.
- Wear ear buds while watching a video on your tablet or mobile device.
- Don’t roll your eyes at screaming babies. You were a baby once. And that is not helpful or empathetic.
- Carry a pen. No, you cannot borrow mine. I don’t want your flu.
- Stop humming, whistling or tapping. And stop sniffling already. Blow your nose.
Does that finally cover everything?  |
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